Elle Jauffret

Writer & Fork Handler

Spaghetti and meatballs à la Spillane (Noir fiction style)

Jan 14, 2014

Starting the year strong 

My boss told me not to judge a book by its cover when I see her. But what did I care? I don’t read anyway. When the broad came to my desk to start the job, bimbo was written all over her. She was squeezed into a tight red wool skirt with a white silk blouse showing her black brassiere underneath, and big blond hair topped her powdered face. She had gams that didn’t end, black stilettos that could kill a man and painted fingernails that matched her lipstick probably called ‘deadly passion’. All I knew is that when she leaned over, her knockers almost bouncing out, saying, “I am Barbie, I came for the job,” the blood had left my brain and it felt suddenly hot.

Within minutes, the entire office was standing at my door, all the gees wondering who the doll was. When I told them she was the Head of Accounts, they all thought it was bunk, joking that they all wanted to take her to the flop house for an hour before she returned to bake cookies for her john. Dumb corporate guys always thinking with their schlongs. But she showed them all. When thrown into the business ring, this dame knocked down all our competitors’ best guys. Numbers were her game and she was making grands for the company like noone before. Within six months all guys had to agree: this broad had balls.

Go Back